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Writer's pictureNozzer Pardiwala

Reviewing the Reviewer!


Anupama Chopra, Komal Nahta, Taran Adarsh, Rajeev Masand.

Surely these names ring a bell in your minds. Or may be not.

They may not be as famous as some of the actors whose films they review; but they are, in their own way, celebrities.

Each one of them have their unique style of reviewing and rating a film.

I am a big film buff (Especially Bollywood. No! Actually, only Bollywood) and also sometimes review a film, if I really like something about it. Last I reviewed was ‘Finding Fanny’. Not that I didn't like any films after that but nothing touched me either. Plus, Finding Fanny was directed by Homi Adajania so the Parsi connect, maybe.

I am sure every actor, director and producer in Bollywood would eagerly wait for the reviews to pour in. But not always do they Garner great ones. And at times I am pretty sure they would want these reviewers to vanish from planet Earth before the release of their film.

But criticism is always good for development of self and art.

So why not turn the tables and put the reviewers in the spot, literally?

So here I am reviewing the reviewer.

I, who! Janta Janardhan! Audience!

Taran Adarsh.

I only view his tweets which show the box office collections of a movie. He is great as a trade analyst.

Komal Nahta ...

Komalji, Bahut gol gol bolte Hai ! In times of tweet reviews and insta-reviews ... Komalji is like Ashutosh Govarikar of reviewers.

I just hope they don’t have fan clubs like stars. If they have. For their fan clubs … I love them.

So I predominantly watch out for three people for sure ...

The seasoned Anupama Chopra

My cute Teddy bear Rajeev Masand

Just hatched Sucharita Tyagi

I am not going in the details of their past laurels or adventures ...just Google them... if you care ...

I am simply reviewing them on the basis of their job as a critic. Will try and not get personal.

Since no one has ever done it before…And they do it all the time to others …

I am sure, they shall take it in the right spirit ...

Anupama Chopra

Anupama Chopra, frankly, should be an English Professor in some well known University. She is so articulate in her reviews one may actually have to be equipped with a dictionary or an equally good vocabulary to know what she means at times.

She probably uses more refined language in her under five minutes reviews then Chetan Bhagat ever used in his entire career. (That's the reason I adored him for a while, till he titled one of his book ‘Half Girlfriend’) …but this isn't about Mr. Bhagat

It's about Ms. Chopra. Being the insider (I don't know what it means) she sometimes is a little biased with her reviews. My opinion!

She should be a little chilled and more natural. Her giggly laughter in interviews, sometimes, comes from a space of a little artifice. She is at times uncomfortable especially when she is interviewing the newer lot. All in all, Anupama should be out there simply mentoring new talent or probably penning a book on The Changing Phase of Indian Cinema.

The first half keeps you gripping but the second half let's you down. I am going with two and a half Stars.

Rajeev Masand

Rajeev Masand is simply so cute.

Cuddly cute Teddy bear ...is the feeling one gets. But wait a minute! Are we getting personal here?

Frankly Rajeev Masand, so far, is the one who isn't easily impressed by anything. I sometimes feel he is expecting a bit too much from Bollywood... Bhaiya ITNA perfection Nahin na hota yahan.

Rajeev, Haven't you heard? Badi Badi filmon main, aisi chotti chotti galtiyaan ho jaati Hain.

At the same time I applaud him for taking his job pretty seriously. He is Frank, honest and mostly never minces words. He doesn't shy away from telling an RGV an RGV.

Personally, more than your reviews Mr. Masand I have started liking your Office Space segment.

You were most comfortable and outright in RGVs’ company but a little uncomfortable and a tad bit intimidated ( at least it appeared so ) in Dharma 's office. My observation.

I am going with 3 stars.

Ting ....

coming to Ms Tyagi

Sucharita is outrightly wacky, to the point of being hilariously and clumsily funny ... but it works!

She manages between being an equally entertaining RJ and Dishing out Not a Movie Review ... probably watching early morning shows (to quote her "I watch these movies so you don't have to watch them") Mehrbaaniji aapki ...

so she goofs up sometimes (like Sridevi ne 500 film kardi Hai)...but then her ardent fans politely let her know and she graciously accepts "hota Hai yaar"

She is very touchy with certain issues in films especially about portrayal of women in films ... Sucharita if you were born in the era I was ... You would have torn the screens ... that was the plight of commercial Bollywood cinema .

On a scale of 1 to 10 ....Teri yeh rating samajh Nahin ayi aajtak...

I shall go with the tried and tested ...

*** and a half

Film Companion walon do review KE beech main is gareeb ko kapde badalne ka time toh de do.

Khaton ka aalam iss kadar hai ki ab hum stamp dekh kar jee behla lete hai…

The state of affairs with Bollywood films currently is such that, every Friday, I wait more eagerly for reviews by you three guys then the film you review. And… mostly, your reviews are more entertaining then some of the films you guys review.

Just one curiosity ... do you guys really get Popcorn And Samosas ...

Free... Free... Free???

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